Well, with trying to get everything on this site together, prepping to travel halfway across the country for two weeks only to come home for two days before I leave for another week, and having a hard time picking a game, reviewing a full game just wasn't going to happen this week. But I will not stand for writing nothing only to leave for the rest of the month leaving all two people actually reading this thinking I quit before even reviewing an actual game, so here's a review of a Final Fantasy demo disc that I found at a garage sale for fifty cents.
Truth be told, me and FF have had a bit of a complicated history. The first one I played was, well, the first one. Or more accurately the ios remake of it that I think was a port of the PSP remake but that's not the point. Overall I thought the game was OK, but it wasn't something I was going to devote time to in order to complete. Then I played Final Fantasy X which I didn't like at all. Maybe it was because the idea of real time turn based combat didn't appeal to me at the time, or maybe I was upset that I bought that as opposed to Kingdom Hearts, but I ended up trading it in the next day, got my money back, went somewhere else, and bought Kingdom Hearts with no regrets. Months later, I bought Final Fantasy IX, which I instantly fell in love with. I guess sometimes in order to take a step forward you need to take a step back. Then I played Final Fantasy IV on the DS. That was actually the game I wanted to review this week, but here's the thing. I like the game, but I don't think it likes me back. I couldn't get to a comfortable point where I could form a full opinion on it. I have a few thoughts on it though. Here's the short version: This game is HARRRRRRRRRRRRRDDDDDDDDDD that is all. And throughout all of the Final Fantasy games I've played, I never cared to get VII. I've obviously heard of the game and it's larger than life legacy, but I never bothered to play it. Well now I own a demo disc containing the beginning of the game. Will this little disc change my mind about VII?
Well the demo begins and there's stars on the screen for about twenty seconds before Aerith shows up picking flowers. The view zooms out showing that this game goes for a more modern style, something I've been indifferent. X did the same thing, and I was weary about it then too. Then we cut to a train where some guys jump off and start beating the crap out of soldiers. Here's where I take control. The first thing I notice is that I can't move with the dual-shock controller. Great, I'm stuck playing a 3D game with a D-Pad. So I step forward and I get into my first battle. The first thing I notice besides the fact that these guys have guns is that I already have Tifa in my party. Now I've seen some gameplay beforehand, and i didn't see Tifa there, so why is she here? Not that is matters because realistically, her punches and kicks pale in comparison to Clouds giant sword that any normal man wouldn't be able to swing, let alone hold it over his shoulder. Oh yeah, the spiky haired dude we're controlling is Cloud. Say hi.
So I go forward and the guys that were being jerks to those soldier which I can't really say because I was just a jerk to some soldiers tell me that I'm an ex-soldier. Okay but I still have no idea what I'm doing here. Who are you people again? Because the unexplained plot demands it I take a few steps until I have a seizure and I'm ambushed by a solider and a giant dog. The Active Time Battle System gives me some time to look around during these battles, and it's around here when I realize that these enemies are firing machine-guns at me. That's not fair, that's completely one-sided against a guy with a bigger than it needs to be sword and a chick with her fists. But my big problem here is that if there's guns, then this isn't really a fantasy setting. I can believe that it's a fantasy setting if there's only steam-punk, but if the guy with the colossus sized sword is being his by bullets and it's not by the works of time travel, then this isn't really a fantasy, only...final, which I know isn't the case because we're at the point where the numbered squeals are getting sequels. Anyways I go in the building and the previously mentioned jerks say that we're here to blow up this giant furnace. Okay but why?
So soon I'm thrust into another battle with a tentacle monster thing. Or is it a robot? I think it is because it just issued an alarm, but I'm not sure because it never got a chance to send it because it went down faster than the giant dogs. So in the next room the black guy(not racist) who I presume to be the leader says he doesn't trust me and joins the Club Hero Brigade. After scoring an item I push a button and go down to climb some ladders. Barret, who's the aforementioned new CHB member, says that this giant furnace is sucking the life out of the planet. So by us blowing it up does that mean we're the good guys or the bad guys? After that Snake Eater worthy ladder climb I'm treated to another seizure. Getting real sick of those. Now I'm sure these things that I'm fighting are robots, but never fear, because Barret is equipped with a machine-gun, driving the fantasy issue I mentioned home.
Well the game instantly shuts me up because these blue things are defiantly not human nor robot, meaning this is my first monster! And it's here where I stop mashing X and start using some magic, which kills these monsters faster than me playing Super Mario Brothers. Unfortunately one seizure later and I'm back to fighting robots again. *sigh* Well we finally make it to the generator and Cloud starts to question if he should do this, until Barret says in this exact spelling "Jus do it foo!". This could be a long night. So the bomb is set, and boss time. A robot. Well, I think this is the end of the demo so time to go all out. After about four summons and a limit break, the boss is down. More time was spent on the summon animations now that I think about it. And now there's a time limit, the age-old video game nemesis. It's ten minutes though so it's being awfully generous. So a few more seizure and spending more time on battling that actually escaping, I'm out and the demo comes to a close.
So overall, I really liked this demo. The classic Final Fantasy gameplay is still here and I would like to see where the plot goes. Of course I have some problems. Not mentioning the "fantasy" issue that I hammered into you'r mind, VII seems to focus more on spectacle than the gameplay. I know it was 1997 and Square was on this fancy new technology that let them do that, but as mentioned before, most of the time shouldn't be spent on watching an animation. If I have enough time to write note in the middle of a battle in a Final Fantasy game, that's a problem, since waiting in a battle in a Final Fantasy game is a good way to get yourself sent to the hospital with a kicked bum. In short, the demo was good, but still hasn't showed me that this is the best RPG of all time yet. I'll just stick with IX.
The Silent Protagonist takes five seconds for his brain to start working every time he does something.
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